Where is the respect that you teach your kids?

Lately I have been privy to articles or sayings that absolutely turn my stomach, from the most educated to the least educated. How can you miss the facts that are staring you in the face? If the media and others believe what they are hearing and decide to judge those who are obviously on the right path, give it up, you are loosing!

When people are confident, they do not need to pretend. Whatever is said is most irrelevant to the masses that have knowledge of the facts.

Do you believe everything you read or hear? If so, you are being influenced by the few who do not know the truth. Be yourself and stop this interpretation of the trash that is always being tossed about these days. Do your homework and stand on your own two feet. Clear your mind and strip yourself of your hanging participles.

Those of you who are parents should be teaching respect for others, not sending them the mixed messages of your disjointed ideas. When you talk about your beliefs, give those who care the knowledge that they can have a differing opinion and you still care, unconditionally. Imposing your ideas is far from allowing freedom of speech.

Family is where it all begins and I believe it means coming together for the common good. Judging people on their beliefs is no more than immature rhetoric and serves only to destroy the fabric of what our forefathers gave us. We do not give thanks or gratitude to those who worked so hard to establish the foundation of our country. Today, we are working to disrespect each other.

We dispute everything, disregard someone else's viewpoints and have revolting conversations that impact too many. Most of us did not learn this behavior from our parents, but we are too open and too free with our comments these days. Since when is this behavior accepted and where is your filter? Advertising your disjointed ideas through the media or Facebook or other sources and writing very disrespectful remarks just tells me you have very low self-esteem and lack respect for individuals in general.

We are all fighting for the same thing and let us not forget that our cultures are diversified. That gives us different ideas and thoughts. We do not believe in the same resolution to our problems, but if we gather together and recognize that we have the same goal there is hope for our future.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief. Ms. Reiske was recently awarded the 2015 Women of Achievement Award by DePaul Community Resources.

Fear is not my friend!

 

As the political year is coming to an end, what comes to mind is the infighting and its infiltration into every fiber of our being. What are we afraid of this day and why must we relegate ourselves to such scathing and derogatory remarks from every candidate running for office?

We are talking about another human being and if anyone spewed the trash we hear daily on the media and in the community, we would quickly divorce ourselves from their rantings. We are supposed to be role models, not angry, inept individuals.

Unfortunately, we are influenced by those who disrespect other individuals. We have difficulty walking the path to prosperity and we blame the wrong people for having the common decency to speak the truth with integrity.

Regardless of your voting record, choose the individual who will best lead this country into continuous and constant growth without the fanfare of the past. Those who believe that wars are the answer to our problems is forgetting the many males and females who are the result of human suffering and the families who will forever be affected.


When we make the wrong choice, we live with it for a long time. Are you willing to take a chance on going down that road? Your life is at stake here and many of you are willing to see our infrastructure get decimated by those who believe they have the answer to every problem and have resolutions that are far from logical or factual.

We have a voice but many of us make a decision regardless of the consequences and will rue that decision tomorrow when it is too late.

We have fractured our bi-partisan views and we are having great difficulty finding common ground. Return to your roots and you may find that you can agree to disagree and still have respect for each other. Get down off that pedestal before it takes you down.

We are a melting pot and the sooner we acknowledge that fact, which is obvious daily, we will constantly find reasons to protest everything. Being afraid of communicating and having a real conversation with those whose opinion differs from ours only prolongs the Cold War between decent people.

Are we ready for the likes of those who rave about what they can do to take more action but do not have the faintest idea how to accomplish that goal? We listen to all the rhetoric that we hear, but do we vote in order to make the changes that we think would be best for America?


Let us show the rest of the world that we are people standing by our convictions and a nation made up of strong, dedicated individuals who care for each person, in service of  our country. Let us find common ground and work with each other to make this a better world. Get up and do your part. This is not the time to constantly complain, but time to act and become a an activist, not a pacifist.

Woman of Achievement Awards - 2015

Carrying on the tradition of this event, which was originally held by the YWCA in 2003, DePaul Community Resources welcomed and recognized seven women for their dedicated contributions to the community.

Fortunately, as one of the award winners I accepted this award as a great honor. What a privilege to be counted among those who have devoted their lives to improve life in every corner of the community. Thank you Betty Etzler and Ann Minnix, two leaders in the field of social work, for nominating me. My support system included everyone from my oldest son to my daughter to my son-in- law and to a host of friends, colleagues and co-workers.

This honor is not only a once in a lifetime occurrence, but to be among the winners who demonstrate their commitment each day to fulfilling the mission of hope, courage and belonging is a truly a treasured gift.

The inspiration and encouragement of all these women will be inscribed in my mind forever. Together, we can achieve immeasurable acts of leadership and help others to accomplish what Alison Parker was determined to do in her short life. Her potential is a reminder that we can be the driving force that engages the community and inspires others to move forward.


Thank you to DePaul Community Resources, and it's far reaching and diverse organization. Your mission is always to open doors where many are closed. Thank you to your staff, and to all the outreach they generously provide that improves the lives of those in need.

My deepest gratitude to all of you.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Have we gone from moral and ethical to let it all hang out?

Watching the news is parallel to the comics except more serious!

Have we been influenced by those who deliver messages of hate and desperation? Those who talk about their religious beliefs but do not walk the walk, is a total farce in my book. Every person has a right to religious freedom but there are those who preach one thing and do another. We once called religious freedom that which respects another's faith. Now we barge full steam ahead with derogatory remarks intended to totally decimate those who have a different opinion. Most of those inflammatory remarks are untrue but there are some who believe this trash.

Politics is far from competitive, it's downright cruel just to get votes and please the constituents. Wake up voters and chose the one who will truly and faithfully understand the future of America. Many of the candidates both Democrats and Republicans, are walking down the path to hell.

Politics and corporations make decisions by the seat of their pants. They do not consider the individual, only the revenue and getting re-elected. Persuasion can be both positive and negative. Persuasion that is positive has substance behind it and the facts are clear and concise. Persuasion that is negative are the mouths that roar but have no plan or do not have the facts to back up their oration.

When some are above the law, and recite a lot of rhetoric do we call this ethical or moral or just pontification in service of the individual? Think twice before you believe and stop sending messages that are disgustingly mud slinging when you do not have all the facts.

Put persons in high places who are respectable, and will not undo the entire strategy of this Administration. Upstarts may look prepared to get the job done, but are they ready to handle all the crisis that is inevitable? Even if you disagree, putting down the people who lead the domestic and foreign policy issues all over the world, is just plain ludicrous and makes Americans look like the biggest fools on the block.

Now is the time to re-think your own philosophy and adjust your half-cocked ideas. Ask yourself if you could be the one to suddenly wave your magic wand and make all the changes necessary to diplomatically bring about a clean slate and no problems.

How realistic is that?

We can build walls and take down those who endanger this country. Yet, how do we accomplish this task? I have not heard of a plan to dismantle this infrastructure. Words are cheap except when you have facts and an action plan. This babble is just that, and many of you fall right into the path to nowhere.

Change is Constant - What is your next dance?

Large companies are absorbed by other large companies and the structure changes. Consequently, you, the employee is skeptical! A lot of questions fly through the air but the acquired company is not yet responding to them and there is no transparency. The CEO's and other top officials do not reveal the next steps. When they do, there is a lot of scrambling and frustration.

Although the employees are not privy to what happens at the top, they often are not prepared for the future either. The employees believe that there is more security by just remaining in place, but they are living in a bubble. Now the bubble has burst and mostly they do not have an alternate plan. What is most unnerving is the thought that in this day and age there is job security. That thought is years old and we live in another generation.

The coast guard have a golden song" Semper Paratus " which translates into "always ready". Employees can take away the thought behind this melody and attach it to their foreheads. We can be influenced by rhetoric and words, but do you believe what you hear? Chances are those influencing you will jump ship and save themselves before you are saved. All the words sound good but is there an action plan or policies that back it up?

Frustration and angry stokes the individual's fire, but what you hear and what is actually taking place is far removed from what is told. Transition and change disturbs anybody's equilibrium, and what you want to say is rarely spoken. Everything is out of balance and where it ends or begins is anybody's guess. This is totally overwhelming and daunting.

How does one keep the old structure and blend in with the new? You don't and the new company researches what is working and what is making revenue. After that study, the new company arranges for their organizational focus which is often the hiring and firing. They hire those with their same philosophy and fire or lay off those who no longer fit their mold. Without all the facts, employees tend to believe the company CEO's are taking drastic steps to make decisions according to their wishes. That is generally far from the truth, although some CEO's believe they are the divine master and forge ahead aimlessly. A team, consisting of the upper echelon, often with months of due diligence, move towards what will make the company stable.

Like dancing, whether it is classical or hip-hop, performance in the marketplace and the value of winning stands out among everything else. If the company is dead set on being profitable, that will be the key to success. The framework requires committed action and energy. Those who are willing and able to fulfill the task of higher quality of service will remain in place, with the knowledge that they must step up to the plate.

Ask yourself if your dance card is full or empty? Remember change is constant.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Is your opinion always right?

Just because you believe you are right, does that make it the only answer. Do you rubber stamp all your responses with indelible ink and try to influence everyone you converse with all the time. A belief system is never so rigid that it cannot be changed.

From heterosexual to homosexual to atheist belief systems, whether you are Democrat or Republican, give the other guy a chance to live his/her own life. The strife that is entailed with so much everyday grief is forever a total waste of energy. Put that energy into helping others and walk beside those who are living the good life. This is not a time to raise your gauntlet, it is time to recognize the goodness in people, whatever their belief system might be.
Years ago, my mother taught me to be accepting and she never interfered in my opinions even though they were not necessarily hers. She loved me unconditionally. The foundation was respect and recognition of everyone's qualities. How many of you can honestly say you do not judge or criticize others?

Your lifestyle may be different than others, but who is to say yours is "Right". The word unconditional is an adjective meaning you don't put restrictions or reservations on loving somebody. Certainly we all criticize others, but do we caste them aside because they do not think the way we do or live their everyday life differently than ours.

Different opinions foster debates and is not abusive? What is real is disagreeing with someone else's opinion but explaining your point of view. Listening to the other individual's opinion and having a mature conversation is versatile and envisions the global picture.

When you believe it is okay to be tolerant, you have taken the first step towards acceptance and respect of someone else's opinion. Opinion is not fact but entirely the opposite. To verbally bully someone into believing the way you do is just plain frustrating and is a serious matter. When you verbally attack someone for having a different opinion you demean yourself as well as the other person.

People are allowed to have an opinion and that applies to you. The next time you get into a heated debate, listen for clues that could change your opinion. If everyone had the same opinion, life would be a very boring place. The truth is you do not have the ONE valid opinion.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Put your ego in your back pocket!

Recently, I have been in the company of egotistical individuals who criticize all those who disagree with their opinions. Since when are they judge and jury for everyone?
Narcissism and egoism fit like gloves and those with these traits are difficult to understand. They believe that they are right and extend their views to those who will follow. No apology or guilt enter their minds because they pound their chests without regard to other individuals opinions. Empathy or listening is a far reach for the egotistical minds.
There is often nothing substantive in their repertoire but a lot of fluff and fury. When asked a direct question, the egotists rarely give a direct answer. The sidestepping is part and parcel of their belief system. Granted some of these individuals are smart but ignorant of other people's values.
Their following is nothing more than what people are thinking but do not take action on because they basically do not lead their lives thinking they are better than others. The arrogance and criticism is a self-esteem issue as big as a boulder. The only way egotists will hear you is if you agree with their disconnected view of the world. Pay attention to what they are actually saying and don't be fooled by their interpretation of what is in reality.
Real people do not talk about what needs to be done, they act on their convictions.  Real people do not have big egos as this is not important to them. What is important is getting to the goal with courage, commitment and caring. People matter and they show their reality through listening, empathy and team work.

When you think you can be the only one who can fix the problems of the world, clearly see the discrepancy in that thought. Throughout history, we know that wars begin with the knowledge that two or more are engaged with their differences. They go to battle and somebody will win, not by narcissistic talk but by diplomatic strategy.
Criticizing every question asked because you do not have the correct answer is ludicrous and self serving. Where is the substance and the educated, historical response? Do you believe everything spoken or written? Sift through your knowledge and admit that you do not have all the answers.

Because someone criticizes your lack of diplomacy and knowledge does not mean that  you are not well versed in what you know. Respect your fellow colleague, friend, family members and stop holding a grudge with everyone. Give yourself time to truly reflect on the important part of your life.
Leave your past behind and put your ego in your back pocket. A new day will begin when you raise your hands and embrace the real you.

Creating your future; values and goals are yours!

Are you thriving or just existing? Have you thought about your values and how you can put them to the best use? Developing from a kernel to a fully popped ear of corn takes a lifetime. It takes a commitment, vision, authenticity, and integrity to develop your creative strengths. It takes your creative priorities in the most satisfying ways to bring you abundant rewards. This a personal and private process and may take a few years. Patience is the virtue that needs to drive you to your goal.

List the top five accomplishments thus far in your life. Be real, truthful and humble and, no embellishments. Now list what you enjoy doing that gives you the greatest satisfaction and energizes you. Your values are the activities, and behaviors that are natural. Create a life that addresses your values, goals and behaviors. What have you been putting off doing or exploring in this lifetime? 

Here are some ideas for your perusal.

• developing hobbies
• planning for your retirement
• more knowledge about business opportunities
• buying property
• having good health

Do a clean sweep of the values that are needless because they will cloud your true values. Unresolved matters tend to clutter up your goals. This is the time to reorient yourself and express your values with a clean slate.

When you are well connected and honestly engaged in attractive endeavors, you are excited and give yourself the room to enhance your life. What values resonant as a value to you - adventure, to create, to discover, to relate, to teach, to win, to have pleasure. Identify your own true values. Choose only values about you, not others.

Choose a project that is aligned with your goals. Do not consider a project in order to get something out of it, but do one that you enjoy. The objective is to have only value based goals. if you have a goal that does not "fit" with your values it is okay to adapt another goal. Remember, you are using your values as a point of reference not a stringent process. Keep it simple and as effortless as possible.

Put yourself on the path to your gift of a lifetime. Be free to indulge in what YOU want to do.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Are you in a dead end job?

Lately I have spoken to professionals who do not like their boss or their job. They are in it for the paycheck and plan to accept what it is for the sake of paying the bills. Granted the job market is not abundant, but there must be something out there that is more gratifying. Question is, have you applied elsewhere or are you content to just occupying a seat that could be deleted tomorrow.

Changing from what you know to something new can be frightening, especially if you are the principal breadwinner. Nevertheless, your children attend school from kindergarten to high school and make frequent changes. Interns become employed individuals. Climbing up the ladder is natural and competitive.

Some enterprising persons develop goals and follow the path to success. They are always learning and indulge in their passion. Enterprising employees do not remain in dead end jobs. Millennials are a perfect example of making a change when they do not see a future in their companies and no chance for advancement.

Some lament that if they had one more degree they could apply for a better job. Unfortunately, they do not take the initial step to go the extra mile to make that come true. In my coaching days, I counseled with men and women who wanted to advance in their career. All they needed were the tools to get the engine started.

Taking a risk means launching into a new job. Staying in a dead end job can be boring and stressful. Weigh the two and think about new ideas, new challenges and take the step that will eventually bring you to the opening of new doors.

Although your work life is important, so is your home life. Doing the same thing day in and day out can be like riding a roller coaster over and over again. Eventually the thrill and excitement is gone and the ride is pointless. If you make changes on the job consider the value you are making for the company. To remain stagnant tells the powers that be they do not need to carry dead weight.

Experience is your calling card to a new job. Look over your resume and update it. A resume tells the interviewer that you are knowledgeable but your interest and enthusiasm also plays a role in the final decision. 

If you think you do not have the tools to compete for a new job, there are many on-line courses that would prepare you. Take advantage of your support system and let them know that you are looking seriously for another job. Believe in yourself and know that someone else will consider your capabilities.

Changes - Driving them down the garden path

Corporations, like politics,  make decisions that do not consider the employee. When you change the manner in which the company reactively makes decisions it infiltrates throughout the staff. Without due process, the corporation is bound to fail.

This morning, I watched three squirrels scamper about taking in as much food as their mouths would hold. They knew when to stop eating. Corporations, often take in more than they can chew and the consequences are tragic. Today, workers change venue in service of themselves. What happens is that the consumer suffers because the workers that resign are replaced by inexperienced personnel. Can you run a business very long when so many are in training?

What comes to mind is the revenue suffers,and the new managers are not respected. There is little insight. When revenue is scarce, corporations tend to make costly mistakes. Buying more companies is not the answer. CEO's are not able to make all the decisions although they think they can. Changes that are made without consulting and listening to the management team, is like walking around helplessly in a fog.

Increasing production serves little purpose when both hands tend to grab whatever seems to fit the occasion. Why not take an inventory of what works and sit down with a reasonable goal and let that be your destination.

Having no organized plan or agenda is futile. Not knowing where the next move will be is like playing chess without any knowledge of the game. Too many sudden changes leaves the staff confused and critical of your motives. When the experienced staff is disgruntled, it trickles down to all staff. Stability and reliability are questioned.

Those who ride the wave and accommodate the upper echelon and those who do not want to upset the decision makers, tend to stay with the corporation. For them, it is just a job and the salary that pays the bills. How can you, in good conscience, remain with a company that is so disorganized? The garden is full of weeds and yet you water them.



The path to success is not lined with gold filigree, but the ride up to the top, although it has its issues, is worth the effort. If business is thriving, but new programs are warranted, take time to plan, gather those who are in the know and devise a timeframe for accomplishment.

Take the garden path that leads to strong roots, not one that is slow to harvest.

Are you "Up to Snuff" or Unprofessional?

Accepting a job means that you are qualified and you are a professional. You fit into the company's mission and you are a team player. Being professional means you are truthful, have knowledge, experience, are timely, organized and respectful among other things. Do you fit into this package?

Doing it my way is fine for Frank Sinatra, but when you throw your colleagues and supervisors under the bus, it is very unprofessional. Triangulation is extremely dishonest and self-serving. Wearing that proverbial smile while you are stabbing someone with your words is neither charismatic or ethical.


When you trust someone you expect the same in return. The exception to this rule is when there is a crisis or a medical issue that must be reported. In this case, you are the responsible one. Trust is one those foundations for a strong and caring relationship.

Do not bad-mouth your boss! That is definitely unprofessional. You accepted the position and you need to be true to the company's mission however the boss rules the roost. If you cannot do this, find another job. Sharing your feelings with colleagues will eventually target you as a complainer and you will be ignored. After all, your colleagues have a voice too. While you threaten to leave, you also do your job with a smile and this is definitely a two-faced, unprofessional action. As the old saying goes, love it or leave it.

Professional behavior is expected of you and your co-workers. Anything less is a signal for dismissal. Unprofessional behavior, like reprimanding a colleague or supervisee in front of others is definitely not in your best interest. Mistakes are made by all, but there is a diplomatic manner to assist the worker by your example, not your ire. Once the air has cleared, monitor the situation carefully, if after close monitoring, the worker continues the same behavior, then you can decide if he/she is suited for the position.

Reactionary decisions only confuse the staff. It is unprofessional to act before you think. This is meant for everyone from the CEO to the worker bees, and should be taken into consideration for a smooth running operation.

When you commit to a plan, whether it is responding to those who have been interviewed or seeing a project to its final stage, do not make excuses for your lack of reasonable timing. Finish what you start and do not blame others for not finishing a project. The exception to this is working with a team that will not adhere to time management.

Ask yourself one question, "Are you the one holding up the process"? If so, you are treading on shaky ground and either change your behavior or admit that you cannot do the job.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Ode To Karen

Karen Garland friend and former graphic artist died on May 30, 2015.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored many articles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Disruptions in the Workplace

When the workplace is disrupted by a new owner and changes are made, much of the time is spent firing or letting go of good workers. They are replaced by the new owners team. There are financial changes too. Salaries are increased and because of their own personal reasons, some of the old staff remains.

The infrastructure is shuffled around and a new infrastructure is established. Influenced by their own past and beliefs, the new owners intentions are two-fold. One is to abide by the new rules or leave and two is to follow the path of the new integration and to make others believe that growth is the bottom line.

Actually, the revenue is the bottom line and the workers are far removed from the company's transparency. The workers are only told what the upper echelon wants them to know.

Today, we are infiltrated by everything from acts of overt and covert behaviors to neglectful and improper behaviors. From politics to injustices in everyday life, there is a great loss of respect. The arrogance of those who believe they are knowledgeable and are denying their lack of experience are often in leadership positions. When are we going to come to our senses and stop promoting those who lack skills as leaders.

The workers who have the experience and knowledge are often ridiculed as though they are new to their positions. This is one disruption that forces the truly skilled to apply for other positions. The change in personnel that occurs is often distracting to the staff and causes the hiring of less than qualified personnel.  I would ask the CEO's of companies to hire those who will increase the growth and have knowledge and experience, not those still in training pants. Stability needs to be the key word. CEO's who reactively hire those they like instead of looking at how they would fit with the staff are just causing themselves more stress.

How does one monitor other workers when the unskilled are responsible for that task? At this point, we have experienced workers who literally are frustrated and insulted by the lack of a supervisor's knowledge. Where is the supervisor who listens and learns?

Granted there are errors made by workers, but diplomacy can only build a good relationship. If supervisors are new to the position, have them build relationships, not act like tyrants.

Look at the supervisor's mode of operation and check out the behaviors that will inevitably cause problems. Sometimes the new supervisor needs to carefully identify his/her inadequate behavior.


Good leadership begins at the top and if that is not happening, look for another position. Leaders can run into walls of steel if actions are not planned diligently and precisely. One can be blindsided quickly by not thinking ahead and how it affects the staff when you make reactive decisions. Arrogance and the belief that you are God's gift to the world has its repercussions.

Leadership, Environment, and Managers who are clueless!

Lately, I have been reading articles about some things to pay attention to when you are the manager. 

The first thing to remember: When you enter the room do employees cringe at your expectations? Do you change your mind mid-stream into a project?

The second thing to remember: Do you keep your employees from meeting their deadline because your meetings last too long?

The third thing to remember: Do you respect your employees and listen to their ideas even though you do not agree with their opinion?

Let me elaborate on each area. If you are not reasonable and predictable, how do you expect your employees to respond? If you have agreed on an action plan do you keep changing directions? This does not entail reevaluating the success of your original plan, but changing directions on a whim. If you continuously change your mind like the wind, employees will get frustrated and leave.

Leadership habits affect your employees and you. When you have meetings that are too long or can be conducted through e-mail or text or phone you should have a time frame that is reasonable and to the point. A lot of time is wasted each day when you think you have all the answers. Give your employees a break and invite them to be a team.

Respect is not a foreign object! Listening and evaluating is definitely a part of your job. You are responsible for setting an example. Supposedly, that's why you are a manager. If you are not strong in that category, take a long look at your job description and find the part that states you are in a leadership position. Good leaders train those who need to learn their jobs and mediocre leaders often play their own drums.

Good leaders know how to achieve and inspire, and have a vision that sets the tone for success. Tap into the skills of those you manage and learn the ins and outs of the business.

When you are clueless about your own job as manager, how can you advise and train others? Although the definition of leadership is not one-size fits all, it is the same sentiment, and it does involve the entire team to reach the goals of the organization.

When you don't have the clarity to know and understand the right thing to do and you depend only on your little knowledge to make serious decisions, the team cannot depend on your contribution. As a manager, you need to be a mentor when the team needs one. If you are a manager, you don't rely on your title, or position to lead. You empower and influence your team and motivate them toward their full potential.

The environment needs to be properly developed and encouraged to reach the goals set by the management. The results will be positive if you have the talent and experience and knowledge to know how to motivate your team.
Working together towards the same goal requires a proactive stance not a reactive one.

Gather the tools to accomplish and achieve the goals. Clueless managers are a distraction rather than a motivation. Leadership skills are learned over time. Leaders set the every day tone that moves the  delivery of the vision towards the goal.

Take time to lead the team on a daily journey. Be mindful of your inadequacies and prepare yourself wisely with the knowledge that each day you will have a learning experience.

Winning by Default! Play the Game!

During the month of March, my eyes were glued to the basketball games both men and women! In my estimation, some games are won by the players and some referee calls are questionable.

In the workplace, some employees are on target and some plod along under the radar. Just as in basketball, some players are leaders and some are influenced by their team members. Is winning important to you or do you accept being the low man on the totem pole?

Is your job, just that, a job with a few strings attached or are you the innovative one who believes that the company can move forward and continually succeed? What do you contribute to the mission of the company? Once you come clean and lift off your mask and face the authentic you, the world will be a different place. Your mission will be real and you will contribute your strengths without fear of repercussions.

Life is a journey and you could be the one who makes a difference at work and at home. You may have a resume and a job description, and you do abide by them, but beyond that are everyday connections with people. Being the center of attention is not where you shine, having a plan is the trajectory that matters. Following an action plan gives you the guidance that you need to be a success.

Winning by default is like coming in third place because you really didn't try to win? Nevertheless, nobody says that you cannot try again! Someone has to win, why not you? This is a good time to pick up the pieces and move on to another territory. Business acumen is not a given and certainly it does demand many things such as knowledge and experience, which takes time to develop. Now is your turn to reach your goal. You can be super-optimistic but super-practical trumps it every time. Give your attention to what the business needs not what you must have.

The business game is somewhat like Monopoly but shaking a dice won't always help you reach your goal. Thinking critically about specifics and the people you want to reach will be the tool that matters.

Pat yourself on the back and review all your good work. Be encouraged by your consistency and energy. The path to success is always paved with your potential.

Learn from your mistakes and make the change. The journey is worth the effort.

Money, Money, Money - greenbacks and their impact

In today's world, money speaks loud and clear in business and certainly in politics. We have little influence or a voice because perhaps we are enjoying the increase in salary and we do not want to rock the boat. If we are not in charge, we settle into what is and are divorced from the upper echelon.

Whether we are blind to the billionaires who rule the roost, or are not on the rung that makes the decisions, we just go along with our job description and ignore the organizational changes.

Recently, I completed an informal survey of those who have changed jobs because of the drastic changes in their companies. There is a great dissatisfaction with the way employees are shuffled to and fro or influenced by salary or benefit changes. We all know that jobs are hard to get. Some stay because they are afraid to step out of their comfort zone, and others are lulled into thinking there is job security in their present job.

Tomorrow, you may be the one who is dismissed because your department is not making revenue. Therefore, now is the time to have an alternate plan. The upper echelon is forever looking for ways to increase the revenue. Ask yourself if you are truly and honestly on the increased revenue path or just squeaking by and hoping your department will not be targeted.

Money may be the root of all evil, but business today is about financial growth and that is what keeps the market competing each day. It is time for you to get on the revenue bandwagon or get off the track.

Do companies that are focused on innovation and success care about their personnel, or are they more interested in outdoing themselves? New ideas and new energy keeps the momentum constant and emerging. Even if those who make the decisions are not always on target, they change course and look for new visions.

Those in charge are always trying to find ways to get recognized as the company that is honored for its success, not its failures. The network of experienced leaders is the team that each day directs the company philosophy and supervision. Even if one individual influences the team, that person does hold the managers captive.

If you hold the purse strings, chances are you direct the path and others will step up to the plate. Whether you believe it or not, the Chief Executive of any company has the right to a strong point of view with support from other experienced personnel.




If you voice your opinion, be clear, concise and join with the philosophy of the company. Be diplomatic and when you have an idea be certain it is attached to revenue. Money speaks volumes and that is what is important to those in charge. Making a proposal that is reactive only defines you as someone who doesn't put much thought into the mission of the organization. Take time to understand what the company values are and follow that route. Count those greenbacks when they are in your pocket.

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Gloria M. Reiske is an MSW, LCSW with more than thirty years experience in education, administration, social work, and coaching. She has authored manyarticles and is published in local media, having written a men and grief manual for training purposes throughout Virginia and an article for children and grief.

Genuine or Phony - What is your baseline?

Genuine or Phony - What is your baseline?

How do you know someone you work with is genuine or phony? Consider whether you are a phony or genuine. Genuine means real, trustworthy, actual, honest, direct but with diplomacy.

The behaviors that tell you that individuals are secure inside and out, is not being worried about what people think, comfortable in their own skin, not seeking attention, not needy, and they tell it like it is without concern about the backlash.
Unfortunately, some people flip/flop and are influenced by the powers that be to the point of looking phony. Actually, those people are hanging on to their jobs and are going along for the ride.

Naive people are concerned with their own insecurity, much of which is grounded in narcissism and their own egos. Genuine people have no need to be liked and do not manipulate. If they are liked or not liked  is not very important, because they are confident in themselves.

In the workplace, there are many different personalities and to get along means working on projects together and most of it is very subjective. Therefore, do we express our opinions genuinely even if others do not agree?  Genuine people can be vulnerable, but they do have a voice most of the time. The phonies of the world tend to march with those who make the decisions and often get the promotions. If you work for a company that seeks those who manipulate and do a lot of head nodding to get ahead, welcome to our world.

In every area of business, politics, medicine, sports, dysfunctional behavior appears to be the norm. Taking with little giving is what makes the news. Genuine good news gets some publicity but breaking news is what we pay attention to and that focus is not always real or actual.

If you are in a workplace that encourages production by squashing those who genuinely believe in humanity and discourages behavior that often believes that a company's growth and success is about the personnel, you may be in the wrong place.

Unfortunately, the upper echelon drives the bus and you probably have a small voice. The communication is not always transparent but your job is not affected. Therefore you continue to plod along and when changes happen, you may make the cut.

Once in a while check out your genuineness. Having charm, wit and awareness, is all worthwhile unless you use them to manipulate coworkers into believing you are real.
It reminds me of a horse race. The favorite is not always the winner. When you put all your money in what appears to be a good thing, you could lose. When coworkers discover that you are more phony than genuine, it is like getting caught in a windstorm and you will be blown away.